I'm single... BUT
Valentine's Day has come and gone, and it felt just like any other day to me. I wasn't depressed, I wasn't bitter, and I didn't feel inclined to send anti-valentine's day cards to all my fellow single friends. Nor did I feel inclined to send valentine's day greetings to people who aren't single.
I have spent many-a-valentine's days single, and each year it becomes clearer and clearer to me that if the only day a year my boyfriend/husband is going to be romantic, thoughtful and a showerhead raining down love and appreciation upon me is the same day that the entire population is getting the same thing... then... well... I don't want any part of it.
As the title of this blog states: I am single... BUT I don't think my indifference toward Valentine's day will diminish when stupid Cupid decides to shoot an arrow at my tushy.
I confirmed that on Monday night, when I had to stop at Walmart for something, and saw the hordes of people. I saw men and women, young and old pushing and shoving through the greeting card aisles, grabbing generic heart-shaped chocolate boxes and the pre-arranged refrigerated cliche red roses, and amusement park quality plush stuffed animals and rushing to stand in line at 9:30 PM on the eve of St. Valentine's day... at Walmart.
The first thought that popped into my head when I saw this display, was: "You're pathetic." You see, on one hand, I can see how it's sweet that men and women go out and buy cards, chocolate, flowers and stuffed animals for their significant others, but it's the lack of creativity that adds the blah factor to valentine's day. You're not only "showing your love" because a calendar tells you to, but you're also buying cliche, manufactured gifts. It's like Christmas and the ugly pair of holiday socks or Santa tie that is sure to make its way under every other person's Christmas tree each year.
I realize that there are a lot of creative people out there taking time to make valentine's day a little less artificial for their valentines. They are probably those who are romantics year-round, and that's wonderful. As for the Walmart shoppers on Monday night, I can only pray and hope that I will not end up with, or being someone who does last-minute valentine's day shopping at Walmart... or anywhere for that matter.
posted by Futbol Lover Girl @ 12:57 PM
1 comments
1 Comments:
In an ideal world people are romantic all the time and know just the right way to lavish affections on their loves so that their loves always feel vital and adored. Unfortunately this is not and never will be an ideal world.
Most people haven't a clue as to how to be romantic, and most people don't have time. Life slips by us so quickly. It is so easy to get caught up in the tasks of daily life and not even realize that there is anything else. That is the reality of most people's lives.
My husband didn't want to do Valentine's. He too felt it was so manufactured. If he was to be romantic (something he generally never is by nature -- though he loves me terribly) he would want it to be something that comes fully from him and forced out of him by a hallmark holiday. But what I told him is that, although it would be nice to find romance on other days, the reality is, it probably won't happen. And with how busy life gets it's so easy to forget to devote time just to one another. It's nice to have a few days out of the year always earmarked for 'us' time.
Thankfully he is fully aware of my hatred of manufactured romance. He knows never to buy me roses, unless they are unusual or meaningful in some way. He knows especially that if he ever shows up at home with a gas-station single rose, he will be thrown out. He knows that I find it lazy and insincere to bring home heart-shaped boxes of chocolates. He knows that I believe that romance lies in gestures, creativity, and effort.
So since it was his turn this year to arrange our valentine's evening (I also don't believe that it is only a man's job to be romantic) and knowing my love of fruits and cheeses, he arranged a candlelit picnic on the floor in our house. He sought the advice of a knowledgeable cheese guy and made it a gormet affair with unusual cheeses and crackers, and complete with an expensive bottle of my favorite wine. It was so lovely. And he knows, that for me, romance is also in the unexpected, so he can probably never do this gormet picnic again.
But I think there are plenty of people who don't share our hatred of insincere and lazy romance. And for them, those silly cards, ridiculous boxes of chocolate and the ubiquitous red and pink hearts are a perfect fit. And if it makes them happy, then good for them. Better they have some romance in their lives than none at all I say. (And you know, a lot of lives probably would be without romance altogether if not for v-day.) We just have to be happy with what we have and fight back the impending nausea when we see them.
;)
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